I have the misfortune of driving past this monstrosity every day. And each time I see it, I feel tormented by the sheer stupidity that people exhibit in the most mundane of projects like these. My spirit is weakened, and my heart saddened by the massive waste of resources caused by these dumb shits that call themselves engineers.

The brief, it seems, was simple: “build a footbridge over a busy intersection that would allow pupils from the nearby school to cross in safety". Such a simple requirement, that one would think even the most brain-dead of simpletons could get it right. Oh no, not this fool. Don’t be conned though: at a distant angle it may appear that the job was well done. A sturdy looking bridge, don’t you think? It starts on one side of the road, and ends on the other. Well made! What’s the problem?

The issue you see, is in the tiny functional details. This particular moron decided that simple bridges were not good enough for Cato Manor. Oh no, he wants a runway long enough to land Boeings! He wants it to be biblical in scale! Why cross a road in one direction? The shortest path from A to B is actually left-right-straight-left-right! Stairs? Pwah! Stairs are so last season. Ramps are in now baby, long ones. Ones that extend your trip by at least a factor of five! Only the biggest and best will suffice!

My initial thought: nobody is that daft. Greedy maybe, but not daft. Possibly the municipality offered to pay him according to the volume of concrete he used in the project? Alas, it can’t be true, as he then would surely have made a staircase on either side in addition to the runways, to increase his paycheck further? Yes, I think the only explanation is that the engineers on this project are so pea-brained that even the simplest of instructions causes them to convulse and fall to the floor frothing at the mouth.

You see readers, it’s about ten paces to cross that street on ground level, and there’s even an island in the middle to perch on should you mistime your run. In contrast, it’s at least fifty paces to get over that bridge! WHO in their right mind would walk five times the distance?! NOBODY, that’s who. It’s not even a freeway, just three small lanes. The traffic light means that there’s always a quick window of opportunity to shoot across.

YOUR tax rands at work. Local government at it’s best. Vote these pricks out on 1st March, for the love of god.